first things first!! I got my new computer as of 9/9/09! lol -- a lot earlier than I expected to receive it! It's so nice and completely functional lol.
I'm a bit fuzzy on a certain issue -- of just, well insincere people-- and if they should even be classified as such. For example, say you have friends that you hang out with on occasionally. The nature of the hangout is purely casual, and you aren't in this primary circle of people. But for the most part, they are very nice to you and always mention hanging out together or simply talk to outside of class sometimes. However eventually you find out that all these events have been happening, and you weren't really included. But given that they want you to hang out with them, and you have made attempts to hang out with them, but their feelings don't seem to add up. Now the question is, are they being insincere...consequently, fake -- in even being interested in you as a friend by not REALLY wanting to hang out with you. OR are they clearly being real because if they don't want to hang out with you, the won't call you just because they said they want to hang out "sometime," and you should have gotten the picture by now. Just let that sink in for a bit..
Note: If you know me, you'd know exactly whcih people I'm talking about lol -- funny thing is, I have told them this too, and I get a "What are you talking about? *with odd look on face*"
Alas, this past week has been alright, nothing particularly special except for getting some clothes, shoes and stuff in the mail. I honestly have to stop spending money on food, and consequently.. for like the rest of the month.. i think my limit will be 10 bucks a week.. or rather for the next 4 weeks. Trust me, I can do this just because of the simple fact that I survived on 5 bucks for like 2 months at some point last year (given I had a larger meal plan last year). I have food stocked up in my rather large bin. So I can sustain myself. and if not, I'll have to use money I suppose. But I took my debit card out of my wallet and it's in my desk now. And when I do that, I make a decision to put a stop to all funds and transactions.
Ugh, tomorrow will probably be the first week of 4 problem sets, frequent Spanish homework and perhaps the start of an art humanities paper. Now, this will... be the end of many large stints of free time I have now which is a bit sad but we have to do what we must to succeed in life. Hopefully I could get this internship I applied to (well there will be more to apply to in the coming days) because I think I have an "in" on it. However, I honestly feel I'm not too qualified compared to other people I know who actually know in this field and did "real" stuff this summer. (Note: I know we shouldn't compare ourselves to others, however, employers do, so that shit matters -- gpa, experience, etc. stfu if you are saying it does not because you are lying.) Someone who can actually talk about finance or..something along those lines, which I honestly can't do -- although I am becoming more and more interested in this certain field I don't quite know if I'm just trying to convince myself if this is the right thing, or if it really is. It the true answer is the former, (I do not really know yet because I still trying to figure out stuff and for myself is this is great) then we have a slight problem.
rawr but for now what I am going to do, is what I've been doing, maxminizing my opportunities, converting myself back into an ultra efficient student, staying true to myself and being cognizant of my actions and there consequences and staying/hanging with real, legitimate people.
--"The surest way not to fail is to determine to succeed." --Richard Brinsley Sheridan
it's on my wall in my room, and honestly I could not ask for something else to describe my work ethic, however I consequently lose a bit of my sanity, but that is fine.
Aside from all this, the 4A crew & co. is awesome, they always been my peoples kudos to the world for setting up that suite. (well the ones we hang with) And they are...well, my only non asian circle of people, which honestly can be really refreshing at times -- because like it's really no offense to them, because I am still there friends lol but.. it's just interesting and nice with the others haha. (oh and the frosh are also non asian too, but then again.. they drop into a different category on their own because they are frosh--that will be something to mention on a later post.
I'm out. see ya.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Sunday, September 13, 2009
A Little...well Really Late but nevertheless, back
Well here I am, on a Sunday, having some downtime, since I got everything down already.. for now, well I still have to rewrite a problem into my homework and I think I should reread my financial econ stuff, since I know some of that stuff didn't really stick into my mind. Now, back on topic.
My room is nice, albeit smaller than last year's (specifically, 20 square feet less) but it's not like I have that much stuff anyway. But at first my closet was an issue, because I guess I have more shirts than the average individual and my entire hanging section of my closet was devoted to the shirts, hoodies and jackets, while my jeans and other things ended up in a drawer on my dresser.
I'm still trying to figure out if I made a the right decision in picking Schapiro, being that the whole building was pretty much empty when I went to register and that my floor was basically going to be about 5 guys (actually, 3 including myself), the bathroom would have been amazing when compared to a lower Broadway floor, a slightly bigger room (which I feel is A LOT bigger) but running the risk of having an excess amount of guys on the floor -- thus killing a bathroom scheme. Also, most of my friends live in Broadway, and i mainly only know around 10 people in Schapiro and am only close to 1 of them lol. But I purposely choose it so that I could be a tad further away, so that I could study more and not be distracted and also have the opportunity to meet a whole bunch of new people on my floor. I think it's coming out well though since my floor is somewhat social and filled will some pretty interesting and cool characters. I'm slowly thinking it was the right decision, but I can't help to think about the "what if.." you know?
--Sometimes don't you hate having to make all these choices? All these decisions that will eventually affect you sometime along the road of life. That's when my view on one aspect of life comes into play. You either make a decision or you don't -- okay this is off the topic of choosing rooms but I am going somewhere with this.
It's along the lines of "trying" --what is the concept of "trying?" The formal definition is --to make an attempt at-- (out of the 5 merriam-webster gave me, this is one I'd like to talk about). Honestly, if you really think about it, when you "try" to do something do you complete it? or does whatever you were doing not get finished? The simplest example would be if I asked you "Try to pop this balloon!" Now what would you do? Pop it right? In doing that you didn't "try" to pop the balloon, you just popped it. I hope it was clear, but you can't "try" to pop a balloon, you either pop it or you leave it alone. In that sense, the whole concept of "trying" doesn't exist. In life, you either do things, or you don't -- and if you really tr telling yourself, that you "tried" to do homework, or you "tried" to study for a test, or you "tried" to call someone (well unless they never answered but well you know what I mean) -- you either did it, or you didn't. And that's why I think everyone at some point needs to self evaluate and think about what they are doing in their lives, and are they really doing everything they can to fulfill their goals, dreams, short-term and long-term agendas/wants/needs or are you just letting opportunities pass by or just fooling yourself into thinking you "tried your best" NO! you either did your best or you didn't. I honestly think it's a healthy and more realist approach to thinking about life because it gives you a nice perspective on things and allows you to at least organize what you want to do with your life. Although it is hard, I think everyone should take a try at this approach, maybe it will help? I saw this man on tv talking about this, and a lot of things clicked months later in a certain point in my life.
Back on track? but I hope things go smoothly this year and that maybe I could make some new bonds, or stronger bonds with people, and hopefully I will be pleasantly surprised sometime during this year with stuff. There has been a whole lot of partying going on haha --I have paried that much though, just some good casual stuff. ALSO something else to think about, have you ever cancelled on other people that you are pretty close with, to then hang out with a different group of people who you aren't that close with but believe you slowly get there if you join them in a hangout or whatever. OR have you gone to hang out with this said circle of people even though you didn't initially want to? but went just so that you could be more a member of the group? -- Given the people in this group like you and want you to be with them and such -- or that you want to get to know them and stuff. Has this ever happened to you? -- well hopefully someone will take a gander at this and comment lol.
--until next time ..hopefully more frequently! I've missed you blogger! (and that was a sincere statement!)
also -- check out username: Timaya -- on youtube! he's so funny and amazing! lol
My room is nice, albeit smaller than last year's (specifically, 20 square feet less) but it's not like I have that much stuff anyway. But at first my closet was an issue, because I guess I have more shirts than the average individual and my entire hanging section of my closet was devoted to the shirts, hoodies and jackets, while my jeans and other things ended up in a drawer on my dresser.
I'm still trying to figure out if I made a the right decision in picking Schapiro, being that the whole building was pretty much empty when I went to register and that my floor was basically going to be about 5 guys (actually, 3 including myself), the bathroom would have been amazing when compared to a lower Broadway floor, a slightly bigger room (which I feel is A LOT bigger) but running the risk of having an excess amount of guys on the floor -- thus killing a bathroom scheme. Also, most of my friends live in Broadway, and i mainly only know around 10 people in Schapiro and am only close to 1 of them lol. But I purposely choose it so that I could be a tad further away, so that I could study more and not be distracted and also have the opportunity to meet a whole bunch of new people on my floor. I think it's coming out well though since my floor is somewhat social and filled will some pretty interesting and cool characters. I'm slowly thinking it was the right decision, but I can't help to think about the "what if.." you know?
--Sometimes don't you hate having to make all these choices? All these decisions that will eventually affect you sometime along the road of life. That's when my view on one aspect of life comes into play. You either make a decision or you don't -- okay this is off the topic of choosing rooms but I am going somewhere with this.
It's along the lines of "trying" --what is the concept of "trying?" The formal definition is --to make an attempt at-- (out of the 5 merriam-webster gave me, this is one I'd like to talk about). Honestly, if you really think about it, when you "try" to do something do you complete it? or does whatever you were doing not get finished? The simplest example would be if I asked you "Try to pop this balloon!" Now what would you do? Pop it right? In doing that you didn't "try" to pop the balloon, you just popped it. I hope it was clear, but you can't "try" to pop a balloon, you either pop it or you leave it alone. In that sense, the whole concept of "trying" doesn't exist. In life, you either do things, or you don't -- and if you really tr telling yourself, that you "tried" to do homework, or you "tried" to study for a test, or you "tried" to call someone (well unless they never answered but well you know what I mean) -- you either did it, or you didn't. And that's why I think everyone at some point needs to self evaluate and think about what they are doing in their lives, and are they really doing everything they can to fulfill their goals, dreams, short-term and long-term agendas/wants/needs or are you just letting opportunities pass by or just fooling yourself into thinking you "tried your best" NO! you either did your best or you didn't. I honestly think it's a healthy and more realist approach to thinking about life because it gives you a nice perspective on things and allows you to at least organize what you want to do with your life. Although it is hard, I think everyone should take a try at this approach, maybe it will help? I saw this man on tv talking about this, and a lot of things clicked months later in a certain point in my life.
Back on track? but I hope things go smoothly this year and that maybe I could make some new bonds, or stronger bonds with people, and hopefully I will be pleasantly surprised sometime during this year with stuff. There has been a whole lot of partying going on haha --I have paried that much though, just some good casual stuff. ALSO something else to think about, have you ever cancelled on other people that you are pretty close with, to then hang out with a different group of people who you aren't that close with but believe you slowly get there if you join them in a hangout or whatever. OR have you gone to hang out with this said circle of people even though you didn't initially want to? but went just so that you could be more a member of the group? -- Given the people in this group like you and want you to be with them and such -- or that you want to get to know them and stuff. Has this ever happened to you? -- well hopefully someone will take a gander at this and comment lol.
--until next time ..hopefully more frequently! I've missed you blogger! (and that was a sincere statement!)
also -- check out username: Timaya -- on youtube! he's so funny and amazing! lol
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